Frights, Fangs, and Healthcare Nightmares in Winning Halloween Haikus

What’s scarier than ghosts and goblins? How about measles, unaffordable dental care, and an insurance claim denied by artificial intelligence?

Nearly 80 healthcare-themed haikus crept into our inbox this Halloween season. Meet the winners of KFF Health News’ eighth annual Halloween haiku contest below.

Follow KFF Health News’ social media accounts (X, Instagram, and Facebook) for more of our favorites. Enjoy!

1st Place

(Illustration: Oona Zenda/KFF Health News; Haiku: DJ Zelle)

Which is scarier?
Jack-o’-lanterns and ghouls, or
Measles and lettuce?

— DJ Zelle

2nd Place

(Illustration: Oona Zenda/KFF Health News; John Fedyna)

Drac on a budget:
His fangs are ineffective,
Dental too costly.

— John Fedyna

Inspired by the KFF Health News “HealthQ” article: “Even With Dental Insurance, You Still Could Face a Large Bill“

3rd Place

(Illustration: Oona Zenda/KFF Health News; Chris Savage)

Cold, no emotions.
It’s not a ghost, it’s AI!
Your claim is denied.

— Chris Savage

Inspired by the KFF Health News article from our “Deadly Denials” series: “Red and Blue States Alike Want To Limit AI in Insurance. Trump Wants To Limit the States.“

While Halloween may be coming to an end, KFF Health News reporting continues year-round. Send us your haikus at any time for possible inclusion in our Morning Briefing: https://kffhealthnews.org/contact-haiku/. 

2025 Halloween Haiku Contest Winners

2024 Halloween Haiku Contest Winners

(Illustration: Oona Zenda/KFF Health News; Haiku: Crystal Decker)

(Illustration: Oona Zenda/KFF Health News; Haiku: Sasha Zitter)

(Illustration: Oona Zenda/KFF Health News; Haiku: Siri Palreddy)

2023 Halloween Haiku Contest Winners

(Illustration: Oona Zenda/KFF Health News; Haiku: Madeline Steward)

(Illustration: Oona Zenda/KFF Health News; Haiku: Tom Cook)

(Illustration: Oona Zenda/KFF Health News; Haiku: Brynne McBride)

2022 Halloween Haiku Contest Winners

(Illustration: Oona Zenda/KFF Health News; Haiku: Paul Hughes-Cromwick)

(Illustration: Oona Zenda/KFF Health News; Haiku: Micki Jackson)

(Illustration: Oona Zenda/KFF Health News; Haiku: Michael L. Millenson)

KFF Health News is a national newsroom that produces in-depth journalism about health issues and is one of the core operating programs at KFF—an independent source of health policy research, polling, and journalism. Learn more about KFF.

This article first appeared on KFF Health News and is republished here under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

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